When you think that all skies are grey.

Like always,my blogs are always late and un-updated.Last two days I had just this stress break down and I cried like crazy.It was about work and also somethings that my "boss" to me.At work is like since my co-worker,the Hong-Kong girl quited I have been doing the service kindda alone and sometimes only one or two of my boss friends will come and help but still I feel like I'm doing the whole service alone.There is also another Malaysian girl working with me but she works at sushi bar and only comes out and help me once in a while and sometimes I think even she helps she only does the things that she wanna do,leaving me doing most of the jobs still.I mean like sometimes I know I need help but I'm kindda afraid to ask and I have this initiative to do the job on my own just to show I'm a hardworking girl which I know I am.There is just so much stress trying to do my best at work till like my mind is like constantly thinking about work and I don't even know when will it ever rest.I mean a lot of people will say "When you finish work,leave your mind at the work place and when you are at home,don't think about work." I don't know,I just can't seem to do that, and the only time I don't think about work is when I'm talking to Sergio.He gives me peace and let my mind rest for awhile.I just broke down in the shower and cried letting the water run and I cried myself to sleep too.Probably It's my first working experience and that explain all the pressure. Iwould usually try to think that I can get through it and stand up for myself like what I did when I was back in high school, in St.John and Interact.I just had to be patience for another 10 days and I'm done.I'm sorry that I can't work for another 4 more days.The first agreement was until 14 June and I have been trying to do my best every morning and every night. My mind is constantly about work and sometimes I feel like I have been left out and I think I deserve more since I have been trying to do my best and been working really hard till now.I don't want money.I just want to feel like more appreciated at work sometimes I just hope that people will treat each other people better.I'm just so so so tired.Wanna be back in school so badly.Let the days pass quickly please.I sometimes think I have killed myself thousand times in my head.